Krystkowiak Will Steal Your Honey Like Someone Else Stole a Bike

I’ve long been a fan of his intensity. And by fan I mean petrified of it because I’ve received a few tongue lashings from coaches in my day and I still remember the best of ’em. And those best ones happened to come from a goatee’d man I’d still call coach.

But he wasn’t 6’9″ and he – to my knowledge – never ran down a bike thief.

And that’s what Larry Krystkowiak did this weekend and it’s piled upon the lore of wildly intense Coach Ks. He ran the fool down, held him until the authorities arrived, and then coached his team. Tweeted about it, too:

He’s drops Barney Fife on you. What?

And ss I’m one to brag I would like it known that I recognized these qualities long ago in the Pac-12 Coaches Death Match. Here’s what I forwardly had to say about Larry K after just a handful of games in the Pac-12:

K, Utah – Dude’s 6’9” and you can’t pronounce his last name which is the same qualifications as that guy Jason Bourne killed with a ball point pen. And sure that dude may have died, but he took Bourne to the brink. Savage.

He’s taking those skills to the streets of SLC. What’s more, Utah is a biking state. People ride hard all over that place and Larry ran a bike thief down. That’s the stuff legends are made of. You don’t steal bikes in Utah. You steal Sugar Bowls from Bama. Roll damn Krystkowiak has a ring to it right?

Now if only he could do something about that left hand column…

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